Well, this past weekend, my church - North Pointe Community Church of Edmonton, Alberta - had its dedication ceremonies. First, on Saturday night, there was a banquet and a concert. As far as the banquet goes, can you spell "s c r u m p t i o u s"? (By the way, right now I am hoping that is indeed the right spelling!) There was moist and tender turkey with gravy, a sweet ham with mustard, pierogies, a fabulous bean salad, and all the fixings, as well as delicious squares (the peanut butter ones were the BEST). It was a great time of fellowship with lots of familiar people as well as lots of new people.
The subsequent concert was phenomenal with Keating (band with Cindy Keating, Vance Moss, Vince Noseworthy and John Squires) as the opening act. They are a rock band with Christian hearts. Every member of that band has impacted me in some way or another, and I love to see them. Check them out at www.keatingmusic.com. The theme of this past weekend was their song "Picture". Great song.
Then Tyler Hamilton performed. Tyler was on Canadian Idol a while back. Oh, how I love gospel music. Tyler has an awesome range and packs a whole lot of soul into his music. The heartbreaker for me was when he sang a song to his daughter and other children as well. There was this one little pixie-ish girl that was mesmerized by him and it really brought me to tears -- she was adorable.
Sunday, we had a dedication service in the afternoon, and the new building was officially dedicated. There were local politicians, provincial politicians, and guest speakers from our District Office as well as from Gateway Alliance Church. I am very pleased to be a part of a church that includes other churches in our prayers and also in very tangible ways as well. We partnered with Gateway Alliance Church for our Children's Vacation Bible School this past summer -- very successfully. It is truly good to have non-competitive relationships with other local churches and be able to synergize our efforts in the Kingdom of God.
It was a great weekend.
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Too Far
God is good.
Feel free to stop reading right there. Truly, God is good. I have a pattern in my life that may need to change. I persist. And persist. And persist. Many times I persist far beyond what is considered normal. It is not enough for me to win an argument -- you must actually agree with me in the end for me to be happy. I am a very mission or project oriented person, and though people think I multi-task well, they don't know what is going on in my head. I am generally focused on one thing at a time, and if too many problems crop up, well, none of them get resolved. I will persist, persist, persist on whatever it is I am doing at the expense of everything else.
In some things, this trait is useful. For instance, in terms of athletics, persisting and pushing limits is a good thing in most circumstances. When I coached one of my sisters playing tennis, I would tell her going into a match, "Remember, you have all day to play this match. Don't be rushed. Persist. Stay with it." I like aggressive playing and a quick win whenever possible, but alot of times, particularly in traditional women's tennis, persistence is key. Being willing to stay out there until you win is the battle of wills, really. And it is usually your own internal battle. When I played what little competitive tennis I played way back when, I was determined, no matter what, to not lose a match on my serve. Even if I was down 0-6, 0-5, and it was my serve, I was determined not to lose that match on my serve. I visualized winning that game no matter what. I'm certain I must have lost matches on my serve, but I bet that wasn't typical for me. I don't remember losing matches on my serve very often.
I push limits. Probably other people's limits as well as my own. I learned how to push limits on a track. Every year, American schools have "Presidential" competitions or something like that. Everyone does these standard activities and based on results, gets either a presidential patch or a certificate. The activities included the broad jump, the 50-yard dash, 600-yard dash, situps, the bar-hang (I think), perhaps the shotput, perhaps other stuff. I think I got the presidential patch once. One of the most humiliating events of my growing up years was the 600-yard dash. That is about 1.5 times around a quarter-mile track, and I could not run the whole event to save my life! I simply could not. The only other person to come in after me was Bonnie Franklin. Every year, I was determined to run that whole event, and every year saw me with tears of humiliation because I would start walking somewhere around halfway through it. But one year was different. Oh, I failed the race again that year. But as other students went up the hill to the gym, I stayed down at that track determined to run a full 600-yard dash. So, I began. I persisted and persisted and persisted and indeed, I ran a full mile -- 4 times around the track. I wanted to keep going, but ran into the locker room and changed for class. I learned what it felt like to push my limits that day, and it was extremely satisfying. There is NOTHING like it.
So, yesterday, I took off on a walk. I don't know why, but I was determined to do a very, very long walk. I began from my place at 117 Street and 133 Avenue and wanted to get to the Sobey's grocery store at 97 Street and 167 Avenue. It was cool and cloudy and a bit misty out at times, too. But I made it there and felt pretty good. Got some broccoli for dinner. I started walking back home, and it soon became apparent that my legs were going to have problems with the trip. Oh, was I in pain fairly early on in the return trip. I decided to look behind me at every bus stop and if I saw a bus coming, I would stop and wait; otherwise, I would keep going. I walked most of the way without even seeing a bus at all, and by that time had reached a point where I was not going to waste the $2.25 on the trip.
I was really pushing my limits on this walk. Sometimes I push the limits in my relationships as well, and the results are not usually what I desire to experience overall. My personal recommendation is to lose this trait when arguing or disagreeing with those you love. Seriously, just lose it. Unless you are pushing your own limits of patience. That might be a good thing, but don't push the limits of others.
Anyway, somehow I made it home and was in the greatest amount of pain since a hiking trip I had taken a couple of years ago in Banff, along with Steve & Patti Hertzog. After that hiking trip, I was unable to climb stairs in any way other than one by one, and Patti -- excellent massage therapist -- had to fix me up as best she could with massage. Yesterday, I thought perhaps I had once again pushed my limits too far, and started worrying about all the implications of that scenario. The kids in the house were concerned because I was limping so heavily. But I hoped and prayed that after a night of rest, my legs would be okay. I popped anti-inflammatories and went to bed.
God is good. I woke up today and forgot I had even done a walk yesterday. I felt like he had once again given me another chance, like he wasn't going to punish me for being foolish enough to do a walk that was obviously too far for me. I hope and pray for his grace with regards to other areas where I have persisted and pushed the limits too far.
Feel free to stop reading right there. Truly, God is good. I have a pattern in my life that may need to change. I persist. And persist. And persist. Many times I persist far beyond what is considered normal. It is not enough for me to win an argument -- you must actually agree with me in the end for me to be happy. I am a very mission or project oriented person, and though people think I multi-task well, they don't know what is going on in my head. I am generally focused on one thing at a time, and if too many problems crop up, well, none of them get resolved. I will persist, persist, persist on whatever it is I am doing at the expense of everything else.
In some things, this trait is useful. For instance, in terms of athletics, persisting and pushing limits is a good thing in most circumstances. When I coached one of my sisters playing tennis, I would tell her going into a match, "Remember, you have all day to play this match. Don't be rushed. Persist. Stay with it." I like aggressive playing and a quick win whenever possible, but alot of times, particularly in traditional women's tennis, persistence is key. Being willing to stay out there until you win is the battle of wills, really. And it is usually your own internal battle. When I played what little competitive tennis I played way back when, I was determined, no matter what, to not lose a match on my serve. Even if I was down 0-6, 0-5, and it was my serve, I was determined not to lose that match on my serve. I visualized winning that game no matter what. I'm certain I must have lost matches on my serve, but I bet that wasn't typical for me. I don't remember losing matches on my serve very often.
I push limits. Probably other people's limits as well as my own. I learned how to push limits on a track. Every year, American schools have "Presidential" competitions or something like that. Everyone does these standard activities and based on results, gets either a presidential patch or a certificate. The activities included the broad jump, the 50-yard dash, 600-yard dash, situps, the bar-hang (I think), perhaps the shotput, perhaps other stuff. I think I got the presidential patch once. One of the most humiliating events of my growing up years was the 600-yard dash. That is about 1.5 times around a quarter-mile track, and I could not run the whole event to save my life! I simply could not. The only other person to come in after me was Bonnie Franklin. Every year, I was determined to run that whole event, and every year saw me with tears of humiliation because I would start walking somewhere around halfway through it. But one year was different. Oh, I failed the race again that year. But as other students went up the hill to the gym, I stayed down at that track determined to run a full 600-yard dash. So, I began. I persisted and persisted and persisted and indeed, I ran a full mile -- 4 times around the track. I wanted to keep going, but ran into the locker room and changed for class. I learned what it felt like to push my limits that day, and it was extremely satisfying. There is NOTHING like it.
So, yesterday, I took off on a walk. I don't know why, but I was determined to do a very, very long walk. I began from my place at 117 Street and 133 Avenue and wanted to get to the Sobey's grocery store at 97 Street and 167 Avenue. It was cool and cloudy and a bit misty out at times, too. But I made it there and felt pretty good. Got some broccoli for dinner. I started walking back home, and it soon became apparent that my legs were going to have problems with the trip. Oh, was I in pain fairly early on in the return trip. I decided to look behind me at every bus stop and if I saw a bus coming, I would stop and wait; otherwise, I would keep going. I walked most of the way without even seeing a bus at all, and by that time had reached a point where I was not going to waste the $2.25 on the trip.
I was really pushing my limits on this walk. Sometimes I push the limits in my relationships as well, and the results are not usually what I desire to experience overall. My personal recommendation is to lose this trait when arguing or disagreeing with those you love. Seriously, just lose it. Unless you are pushing your own limits of patience. That might be a good thing, but don't push the limits of others.
Anyway, somehow I made it home and was in the greatest amount of pain since a hiking trip I had taken a couple of years ago in Banff, along with Steve & Patti Hertzog. After that hiking trip, I was unable to climb stairs in any way other than one by one, and Patti -- excellent massage therapist -- had to fix me up as best she could with massage. Yesterday, I thought perhaps I had once again pushed my limits too far, and started worrying about all the implications of that scenario. The kids in the house were concerned because I was limping so heavily. But I hoped and prayed that after a night of rest, my legs would be okay. I popped anti-inflammatories and went to bed.
God is good. I woke up today and forgot I had even done a walk yesterday. I felt like he had once again given me another chance, like he wasn't going to punish me for being foolish enough to do a walk that was obviously too far for me. I hope and pray for his grace with regards to other areas where I have persisted and pushed the limits too far.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
YA
Young adults. No one who has known me for a long time would guess that I would have a heart for young adults in any way, shape, or form. This is definitely something new for me.
I hated being a young adult. I felt awkward, young, naive, stupid, untrained, fat, unattractive, etc. And frankly, when I looked at most young adults during that time, I saw alot of the same traits (i.e., naive, stupid), but I mostly thought most other young adults seemed more fortunate, prettier, more accepted, etc. My young adult years were spent in the Metro Detroit area of Michigan -- a place where many young adults never seemed to grow up. I was independent as quickly as possible, though not in the most advantageous way.
The young adults I associated with -- my friends -- were pretty much partiers. We loved to go out to the bars and dance the nights away (or watch the dancing in some cases). I must admit, I love good dance music played very loudly, and I love to dance, though I don't do that in the bars anymore! I remember many a winter night, where it was dangerous to be on the road sober, much less in the state we were in.
Amazingly (search for irony coming up), I did not meet the nicest young adults.
Fast forward 20 years. I am living with 7 young adults that are attending Vanguard Bible College. I lived with 5 young adults last year. And I have to tell you, my attitude has done a 180 degree turnaround. These young adults, who are attending bible college, getting a strong faith foundation, have totally impressed me. I don't claim to have an understanding of them, but in talking with them, I am totally impressed with their authenticity. Not that they are perfect, mind you, but they are "real" to me. The young adults in my past were plastic and seeking an obvious self-gratification. These young adults are seeking a good foundation for their growth into the ministry. I am wow'ed and just a little bit jealous and yearning to do it all over again, but better.
I hated being a young adult. I felt awkward, young, naive, stupid, untrained, fat, unattractive, etc. And frankly, when I looked at most young adults during that time, I saw alot of the same traits (i.e., naive, stupid), but I mostly thought most other young adults seemed more fortunate, prettier, more accepted, etc. My young adult years were spent in the Metro Detroit area of Michigan -- a place where many young adults never seemed to grow up. I was independent as quickly as possible, though not in the most advantageous way.
The young adults I associated with -- my friends -- were pretty much partiers. We loved to go out to the bars and dance the nights away (or watch the dancing in some cases). I must admit, I love good dance music played very loudly, and I love to dance, though I don't do that in the bars anymore! I remember many a winter night, where it was dangerous to be on the road sober, much less in the state we were in.
Amazingly (search for irony coming up), I did not meet the nicest young adults.
Fast forward 20 years. I am living with 7 young adults that are attending Vanguard Bible College. I lived with 5 young adults last year. And I have to tell you, my attitude has done a 180 degree turnaround. These young adults, who are attending bible college, getting a strong faith foundation, have totally impressed me. I don't claim to have an understanding of them, but in talking with them, I am totally impressed with their authenticity. Not that they are perfect, mind you, but they are "real" to me. The young adults in my past were plastic and seeking an obvious self-gratification. These young adults are seeking a good foundation for their growth into the ministry. I am wow'ed and just a little bit jealous and yearning to do it all over again, but better.
Monday, September 18, 2006
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Yearn to Burn or Burn to Yearn
Well, I am certainly thankful to God for many, many things. I seem to get chance after chance (day after day) to improve, grow, whatever you want to call it.
But this last month has been very tough. About a month ago, I had two fender-benders in one week. The 2nd one was far worse than the first. So, I've started walking everywhere. If only that was my biggest problem. . . but that is for another devotional! Anyway, today I went to drive the car to church, and a window was busted out. Someone busted in so they could steal my CD player. They did not seem to take anything else. Too bad. The key to the dratted car was in a compartment. I almost wish the whole thing could have gone away. Perhaps next time.
My room & board mates, Jordyn and Andrea, were with me in the car when the discovery of the break in was made. I wasn't noticably upset; inside, I was just mad at myself a bit. I had to stop the car and close the door that had been opened. Then, I had to stop the car because apparently, they broke into the trunk, though they don't appear to have taken anything, although I have not yet checked for my flute. I had to shut the trunk. As I climbed back in and told Jordyn (in the back) that it was going to be a bit of a cold ride, she said, "Wow. You are really handling this well -- I would have been yelling and whatever." I was glad that I wasn't all that upset -- and immediately thanked God for that. "Well, Jordyn, I could be upset, but it would really be pretty pointless."
As usual, though, God reveals himself in tough circumstances. Like I said, I've been doing alot of walking -- alot. So, this past Friday, I decided to walk to Safeway which is about a 20 - 25 minute walk. Jordyn said, "Don't go! It is pouring outside!" But I have been walking enough that I would miss it if I did not do it. So, I took off out the front door. As I began walking up 117 Street, a funny thing happened. It has happened before, but not for a while. I used to love it when it occurred.
I felt the yearn to burn. That's right. I wanted to feel my legs burn, burn, burn on a run. My legs felt good, the rain (just a drizzle really) did not really bother me, though it was cold. I imagined myself jogging, sprinting, turning curves. The walking has lightened me up a little bit, though it is not really noticable on the outside. And when I lighten up, I want to start running. Soon . . .
I starting thinking about the bible study I started with again the day before, and how grateful I am to get back into it, and how excited I am to start reading the bible for more than just to complete my "reading for the day" kind of thing, and how I know that I am going to experience God's touch. I looked forward to returning from my trip to Safeway to do the day's homework. I felt the burn to yearn. That's right. My heart hurt to yearn, yearn, yearn for God's tangible presence.
If I soon get to feel my legs burn and my heart yearn more and more . . . well, I'm pretty sure that is as close to heaven as I will be able to get on earth.
God, I love you for your faithfulness. You did not cause me to have fender benders. You did not cause my window to be busted in or my possessions stolen. But you took these things and turned them into something good. When I am low, you bring me up again. How could I be anything but grateful to you. I pray that somehow this message gets passed on to someone who needs the same kind of lift. Who needs to have the yearn to burn and / or the burn to yearn reignited in them once again.
But this last month has been very tough. About a month ago, I had two fender-benders in one week. The 2nd one was far worse than the first. So, I've started walking everywhere. If only that was my biggest problem. . . but that is for another devotional! Anyway, today I went to drive the car to church, and a window was busted out. Someone busted in so they could steal my CD player. They did not seem to take anything else. Too bad. The key to the dratted car was in a compartment. I almost wish the whole thing could have gone away. Perhaps next time.
My room & board mates, Jordyn and Andrea, were with me in the car when the discovery of the break in was made. I wasn't noticably upset; inside, I was just mad at myself a bit. I had to stop the car and close the door that had been opened. Then, I had to stop the car because apparently, they broke into the trunk, though they don't appear to have taken anything, although I have not yet checked for my flute. I had to shut the trunk. As I climbed back in and told Jordyn (in the back) that it was going to be a bit of a cold ride, she said, "Wow. You are really handling this well -- I would have been yelling and whatever." I was glad that I wasn't all that upset -- and immediately thanked God for that. "Well, Jordyn, I could be upset, but it would really be pretty pointless."
As usual, though, God reveals himself in tough circumstances. Like I said, I've been doing alot of walking -- alot. So, this past Friday, I decided to walk to Safeway which is about a 20 - 25 minute walk. Jordyn said, "Don't go! It is pouring outside!" But I have been walking enough that I would miss it if I did not do it. So, I took off out the front door. As I began walking up 117 Street, a funny thing happened. It has happened before, but not for a while. I used to love it when it occurred.
I felt the yearn to burn. That's right. I wanted to feel my legs burn, burn, burn on a run. My legs felt good, the rain (just a drizzle really) did not really bother me, though it was cold. I imagined myself jogging, sprinting, turning curves. The walking has lightened me up a little bit, though it is not really noticable on the outside. And when I lighten up, I want to start running. Soon . . .
I starting thinking about the bible study I started with again the day before, and how grateful I am to get back into it, and how excited I am to start reading the bible for more than just to complete my "reading for the day" kind of thing, and how I know that I am going to experience God's touch. I looked forward to returning from my trip to Safeway to do the day's homework. I felt the burn to yearn. That's right. My heart hurt to yearn, yearn, yearn for God's tangible presence.
If I soon get to feel my legs burn and my heart yearn more and more . . . well, I'm pretty sure that is as close to heaven as I will be able to get on earth.
God, I love you for your faithfulness. You did not cause me to have fender benders. You did not cause my window to be busted in or my possessions stolen. But you took these things and turned them into something good. When I am low, you bring me up again. How could I be anything but grateful to you. I pray that somehow this message gets passed on to someone who needs the same kind of lift. Who needs to have the yearn to burn and / or the burn to yearn reignited in them once again.
Friday, September 15, 2006
Spinach
“An honest answer is like a kiss of friendship.” Proverbs 24:26
If I counted all the people who are willing to tell me there is spinach stuck in my teeth, I believe depression would hit as I realized the scarcity of real friendship.
If I counted all the people who are willing to tell me there is spinach stuck in my teeth, I believe depression would hit as I realized the scarcity of real friendship.
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Bible Study Fellowship
Ahhhhhh.....it was just like putting on my most comfortable shoes. I have missed the comfort of Bible Study Fellowship these past couple of years, but today was day one of this year's study of the book of Romans.
I'm under a bit of stress right now, and perhaps that is what lead me to tears while we 50 women or so were singing hymns to start off the session today, but I don't think that was it. It was simply the beautiful sound of 50 voices raised to God in worship.
I am so excited about this study -- it has been so long since I've been a part of a study that isn't a mass-marketed, media-hyped, DVD-driven, everybody-jump-on-the-bandwagon experience. This study has been around since the 1950's, and I doubt its format or content have changed much at all. I love exploring the Bible and learning what God has for us in His word on a daily basis.....
I took the bus there and met some interesting people along the way. One young lady who was at the original bus stop I was at is studying to be a lawyer at Grant MacEwan. Her interest is on the prosecutor side, so I told her about my friend Nathan who is a Crown Prosecutor for the RCMP.
I saw my friend Carla at BSF, and she gave me a ride home -- I was very grateful for that as it POURED most of the day today. I have an awful cold and it hurts to breathe tonight -- Fall has arrived.
Lord, I thank you for the opportunity to begin studying with Bible Study Fellowship again. I thank you for the ladies who remembered me from over two years ago and for the comforting knowledge that my time here is not wasted even when it seems that perhaps it is. I praise you, God, for inspiring the originators of Bible Study Fellowship to develop this 7-year study that is still alive and vibrant all over the world today. I pray that you continue to guide both men and women to this study to learn about you through studying together, singing together, praising together, etc. I pray that our time there honours you. In Jesus' name, Amen.
I'm under a bit of stress right now, and perhaps that is what lead me to tears while we 50 women or so were singing hymns to start off the session today, but I don't think that was it. It was simply the beautiful sound of 50 voices raised to God in worship.
I am so excited about this study -- it has been so long since I've been a part of a study that isn't a mass-marketed, media-hyped, DVD-driven, everybody-jump-on-the-bandwagon experience. This study has been around since the 1950's, and I doubt its format or content have changed much at all. I love exploring the Bible and learning what God has for us in His word on a daily basis.....
I took the bus there and met some interesting people along the way. One young lady who was at the original bus stop I was at is studying to be a lawyer at Grant MacEwan. Her interest is on the prosecutor side, so I told her about my friend Nathan who is a Crown Prosecutor for the RCMP.
I saw my friend Carla at BSF, and she gave me a ride home -- I was very grateful for that as it POURED most of the day today. I have an awful cold and it hurts to breathe tonight -- Fall has arrived.
Lord, I thank you for the opportunity to begin studying with Bible Study Fellowship again. I thank you for the ladies who remembered me from over two years ago and for the comforting knowledge that my time here is not wasted even when it seems that perhaps it is. I praise you, God, for inspiring the originators of Bible Study Fellowship to develop this 7-year study that is still alive and vibrant all over the world today. I pray that you continue to guide both men and women to this study to learn about you through studying together, singing together, praising together, etc. I pray that our time there honours you. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Friday, September 08, 2006
How do you mend a broken heart?
"That is why the LORD says, ' Turn to me now, while there is time! Give me your hearts. Come with fasting, weeping, and mourning. Don't tear your clothing in your grief; instead, tear your hearts.' "
Joel 2:12-13
And there you have it. It is easy to tear one's clothing -- not so easy to tear one's heart. When is a heart broken enough? Ever?
Joel 2:12-13
And there you have it. It is easy to tear one's clothing -- not so easy to tear one's heart. When is a heart broken enough? Ever?
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Rebuked
“Then Joab went to the king’s room and said to him, “We saved your life today and the lives of your sons, your daughters, and your wives and concubines. Yet you act like this, making us feel ashamed, as though we had done something wrong. You seem to love those who hate you and hate those who love you. You have made it clear today that we mean nothing to you. If Absalom had lived and all of us had died, you would be pleased.”
2 Samuel 19:5-6
Rebuked
I wonder if you are like me. I wonder if you have had a number of experiences where you love somebody, or you are loyal to somebody, or you go to bat for somebody, or you help somebody out . . . and then, that somebody rejects you. It seems as if they don’t care or don’t value real love or loyalty, or they aren’t able to distinguish real love or loyalty from false love or loyalty. I have experienced this too many times in my life. It wearies me.
I think many children experience this as they integrate into some public school systems. Most children want to be accepted – I would guess acceptance is even a developmental need in order to become a well-balanced adult. But there aren’t many schools I have been to where all kids are accepted or feel accepted. Wanting to be part of the “in-crowd” in a way indicates a child’s love for those already in the “in-crowd” – at least from the child’s perspective. What happens when that acceptance doesn’t occur? We feel a lot like Joab did when he rebuked David. Why would anyone reject us who love and demonstrate our love in tangible, sacrificial and costly ways?
Fact is, if you were like me at times, feeling not accepted by a chosen peer group, you then began rejecting those people that actually loved you! I remember being asked to a Homecoming dance by our Chilean exchange student who I was certainly fascinated with, but I turned him down – not part of the in-crowd. Thus, there was no Homecoming dance for me. (By the way, in thinking about this, I am extremely embarrassed at how stupid I was as well as how unkind I could be. My loss totally.)
I spent my time wondering why those I loved hated me and those I hated loved me. In hindsight, the irony is that I hated those who loved me and loved those who hated me.
I remember a Business Communications Course I took from the University of Virginia’s Falls Church extension campus. I was just starting to go back to school after years of not really trying at all, and I was a bit insecure – especially about writing. Though creative writing was a part of my growing up years, my last year of high school and subsequent years found me claiming to have “writer’s block”. I did not seem to be able to spit out a paper no matter my efforts.
There were about a dozen students. Our instructor was well-recognized and well-educated in the field of business communications. She had an interest particularly in the differences in communication styles between men and women. We read one of Deborah Tannen’s books to aid in our understanding of the subject. She also spent a lot of time on understanding meta-messages we give in our communications with others. Body language, choice of words, timing, etc., were all studied and debated.
It was interesting to go back to school as an adult. There were a lot of similarities to elementary school in this classroom. Whenever the instructor was not there, most of the students would criticize her and mock her in a very immature way. I did not participate as that particular behavior disgusted me. I held my tongue and simply did my work. I thought my work was pretty good, too. Developing presentations in this subject was fun.
We started getting writing assignments, and my grades came back a bit lower than I liked, but I figured that was just a function of so many years since any effort was made. We students compared grades – ah yes, mine was low compared to many. There were some high “A”’s floating around, and none of them floated toward me! They all floated to students who even mocked the “A”s they were given. They mimicked, they mocked, they didn’t do their work until the night before it was due. I respected, I honoured, I did copious amounts of work during the week before the assignment was due. They ended up with “A”s and I ended up with a “C+”. The instructor even honoured a particular woman in the class as the best in the class. Can you guess what I am going to tell you next? If you guessed that the woman she honoured was actually the ringleader and the worst of the mockers and mimickers, then you are right. I felt just like Joab felt, but did nothing because I also felt perhaps my writing really wasn’t very good at all or was just starting to redevelop.
I can think of numerous times in the workplace, some involving me, some not, when I observed this same situation of a boss not knowing who his/her real allies were and who was working against them.
The Bible tells of one such instance. Check out 2 Chronicles 23 and 24. The story is told of Joash – a King of Judah. According to the Bible, “Joash did what was pleasing in the Lord’s sight throughout the lifetime of Jehoiada the priest.” (2 Chronicles 24 : 2) Jehoiada and his wife Jehosheba hid and protected Joash from death as an infant as nearly all of the rest of his family was wiped out. Jehoiada and his sons anointed Joash as the King while dethroning Athaliah (not a good queen). Jehoiada chose wives for Joash. Jehoiada helped Joash repair the Temple.
Jehoiada died at 130 years old. His lifetime of loyal service was rewarded by Joash as can be read in 2 Chronicles 24 : 21-22: “Then the leaders plotted to kill Zechariah, and King Joash ordered that they stone him to death in the courtyard of the Lord’s Temple. That was how King Joash repaid Jehoiada for his loyalty—by killing his son. Zechariah’s last words as he died were, ‘May the Lord see what they are doing and avenge my death!’ “
Honestly, what is up with that? All those things that Jehoiada did amounted to NOTHING in Joash’s mind? How could it not be obvious to Joash that Jehoiada loved him?
The Bible tells us to “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.” (Colossians 3 : 23) But when you feel misunderstood, misused, rejected, or any combination of these things, by your earthly master so to speak, it is tempting to speak up as did Joab. As a Christian, sometimes it is hard to know when to speak up and when to stay silent. Staying silent is often the preferred choice (do I really need to use a scripture reference – see all of Proverbs!)
Tonight I pray that the Lord works on my heart in terms of this issue. I pray that I start to care less and less and less about who the “in-crowd” is and care more and more and more about those who are still a part of the crowd that is outside of the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. I pray for the forgiveness of my sins, including “hating” the ones who have loved me, and I forgive those who have seemed to hate me even though I have loved them. I pray that with the writing of this devotional, I let the past be the past, and begin to move forward again. I pray for the lightness of spirit that only real forgiveness can bring. And Lord, when I want to speak out of turn, please rebuke me.
2 Samuel 19:5-6
Rebuked
I wonder if you are like me. I wonder if you have had a number of experiences where you love somebody, or you are loyal to somebody, or you go to bat for somebody, or you help somebody out . . . and then, that somebody rejects you. It seems as if they don’t care or don’t value real love or loyalty, or they aren’t able to distinguish real love or loyalty from false love or loyalty. I have experienced this too many times in my life. It wearies me.
I think many children experience this as they integrate into some public school systems. Most children want to be accepted – I would guess acceptance is even a developmental need in order to become a well-balanced adult. But there aren’t many schools I have been to where all kids are accepted or feel accepted. Wanting to be part of the “in-crowd” in a way indicates a child’s love for those already in the “in-crowd” – at least from the child’s perspective. What happens when that acceptance doesn’t occur? We feel a lot like Joab did when he rebuked David. Why would anyone reject us who love and demonstrate our love in tangible, sacrificial and costly ways?
Fact is, if you were like me at times, feeling not accepted by a chosen peer group, you then began rejecting those people that actually loved you! I remember being asked to a Homecoming dance by our Chilean exchange student who I was certainly fascinated with, but I turned him down – not part of the in-crowd. Thus, there was no Homecoming dance for me. (By the way, in thinking about this, I am extremely embarrassed at how stupid I was as well as how unkind I could be. My loss totally.)
I spent my time wondering why those I loved hated me and those I hated loved me. In hindsight, the irony is that I hated those who loved me and loved those who hated me.
I remember a Business Communications Course I took from the University of Virginia’s Falls Church extension campus. I was just starting to go back to school after years of not really trying at all, and I was a bit insecure – especially about writing. Though creative writing was a part of my growing up years, my last year of high school and subsequent years found me claiming to have “writer’s block”. I did not seem to be able to spit out a paper no matter my efforts.
There were about a dozen students. Our instructor was well-recognized and well-educated in the field of business communications. She had an interest particularly in the differences in communication styles between men and women. We read one of Deborah Tannen’s books to aid in our understanding of the subject. She also spent a lot of time on understanding meta-messages we give in our communications with others. Body language, choice of words, timing, etc., were all studied and debated.
It was interesting to go back to school as an adult. There were a lot of similarities to elementary school in this classroom. Whenever the instructor was not there, most of the students would criticize her and mock her in a very immature way. I did not participate as that particular behavior disgusted me. I held my tongue and simply did my work. I thought my work was pretty good, too. Developing presentations in this subject was fun.
We started getting writing assignments, and my grades came back a bit lower than I liked, but I figured that was just a function of so many years since any effort was made. We students compared grades – ah yes, mine was low compared to many. There were some high “A”’s floating around, and none of them floated toward me! They all floated to students who even mocked the “A”s they were given. They mimicked, they mocked, they didn’t do their work until the night before it was due. I respected, I honoured, I did copious amounts of work during the week before the assignment was due. They ended up with “A”s and I ended up with a “C+”. The instructor even honoured a particular woman in the class as the best in the class. Can you guess what I am going to tell you next? If you guessed that the woman she honoured was actually the ringleader and the worst of the mockers and mimickers, then you are right. I felt just like Joab felt, but did nothing because I also felt perhaps my writing really wasn’t very good at all or was just starting to redevelop.
I can think of numerous times in the workplace, some involving me, some not, when I observed this same situation of a boss not knowing who his/her real allies were and who was working against them.
The Bible tells of one such instance. Check out 2 Chronicles 23 and 24. The story is told of Joash – a King of Judah. According to the Bible, “Joash did what was pleasing in the Lord’s sight throughout the lifetime of Jehoiada the priest.” (2 Chronicles 24 : 2) Jehoiada and his wife Jehosheba hid and protected Joash from death as an infant as nearly all of the rest of his family was wiped out. Jehoiada and his sons anointed Joash as the King while dethroning Athaliah (not a good queen). Jehoiada chose wives for Joash. Jehoiada helped Joash repair the Temple.
Jehoiada died at 130 years old. His lifetime of loyal service was rewarded by Joash as can be read in 2 Chronicles 24 : 21-22: “Then the leaders plotted to kill Zechariah, and King Joash ordered that they stone him to death in the courtyard of the Lord’s Temple. That was how King Joash repaid Jehoiada for his loyalty—by killing his son. Zechariah’s last words as he died were, ‘May the Lord see what they are doing and avenge my death!’ “
Honestly, what is up with that? All those things that Jehoiada did amounted to NOTHING in Joash’s mind? How could it not be obvious to Joash that Jehoiada loved him?
The Bible tells us to “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people.” (Colossians 3 : 23) But when you feel misunderstood, misused, rejected, or any combination of these things, by your earthly master so to speak, it is tempting to speak up as did Joab. As a Christian, sometimes it is hard to know when to speak up and when to stay silent. Staying silent is often the preferred choice (do I really need to use a scripture reference – see all of Proverbs!)
Tonight I pray that the Lord works on my heart in terms of this issue. I pray that I start to care less and less and less about who the “in-crowd” is and care more and more and more about those who are still a part of the crowd that is outside of the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. I pray for the forgiveness of my sins, including “hating” the ones who have loved me, and I forgive those who have seemed to hate me even though I have loved them. I pray that with the writing of this devotional, I let the past be the past, and begin to move forward again. I pray for the lightness of spirit that only real forgiveness can bring. And Lord, when I want to speak out of turn, please rebuke me.
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