Garbage

Shamed, my heart hurts.
Why is it so hard?
Cleaning up old garbage
That should have been
Cleaned up long ago.
Too many things grabbing
focus, focus, focus.
No time to be found
For good reason -
Time must be made.
God makes the time to
Take garbage in and
Purify it.

I Miss You

I miss you.

I miss your clarity.
I miss your counsel.
I miss your wisdom.

I miss you.

I miss your candor.
I miss your wit.
I miss your perspective.

I miss you.

I miss your confidence.
I miss your goofiness.
I miss your joy.

I miss you.

I miss your fairness.
I miss your passion.
I miss your being.

I miss you.

Alas

Today my folks left. I did not anticipate that this would be an emotional event for me, but it was. And I have no idea why, really.

Friday, they took off by themselves for a bit, went to the public library and a museum. We met up around dinner time and went to Steve and Patty Hertzog's house for a barbecue with the Hertzog's, Patty's friends Judy and Sue from Montreal. I so enjoyed meeting these friends, and I know my parents had a good time as well.

Then, more friends from Montreal came in -- Diane and Carol -- and about 10 other people showed up, too (Kevin, Sharon -- I think -- their kids and their kids friends). Whew! A packed house! It was great! Like having ready-made family available.

The stories were great, the laughter, fellowship and dinner were great as well.

This morning, back on the north side, we woke up, got ready and headed out for breakfast at Sam's (97th Street and 137th Avenue). But before we left, we met a very nice, interesting and funny man, Art -- Erica's brother-in-law. We had a fabulous time chatting with him and then took off for breakfast. Breakfast was great. And then I was dropped off as my folks took off for the airport for their return flight.

Just as their flights out were chaotic, so were their flights back to Detroit. They were scheduled to get in around 11:00, and instead got in after 1:00 a.m. High winds and storms in Denver, as well as a major malfunction on one plane, lead to the delay. Further, they received none of their luggage on arrival!

Lord, I thank you for my parents safe flights out here a week ago, their safety in driving around this city of crazy driving, and their safe flights home. I thank you, Lord, for bringing them here this summer, for the good friends who treated them so well, for a roof to put over their heads, for new friends met. Thank you, Lord, for the opportunity to share a grace-filled church with my parents, even though they never actually made a service. I thank you for friends filled with love for you and their desire to share that love with others. I pray that the experiences my parents had in Edmonton impact their lives in a positive manner and that they return again for more. Thank you, Lord.

Scrabble and Golf

Not everyone would know that these two things are very complementary -- especially when we are talking about the card game of Golf!!

Tonight we played Scrabble and Golf -- me, Patty, and my folks, that is! But let me back up and recap this week with my folks.

Firstly, they were not able to come in on Saturday night as planned (flight delays in Detroit due to flooding. So, they arrived at about 5:00 p.m. on Sunday. This, after further delays in Chicago due to steering problems on the plane. As they were unpacking their luggage from the trunk of their rental car, they realized they had left some luggage on the conveyer belt at the airport. We called the airport, but they would not let us know if it was there or anything like that -- they insisted we must come to the airport. We decided to pick it up the following day on the way to the mountains.

In the meantime, we had a barbeque to get to on Sunday evening. My pastor and his wife -- Bob and Joce Jones, and some of my bible study group --Tim and Kathy Fowler, Cliff and Harriett Hastman, Steve Hertzog, Carla Hillestad, Jim and Joanne Lantz, Jim and Suzanne Stoddart, all convened at Randy and Arlene James' house for a great chicken barbeque dinner including . . . well, you guessed it -- barbequed chicken, many salads, a delightful rhubarb crisp, coffee and all accoutrements. The fellowship was phenomenal, my parents were welcomed to Edmonton, and I believe a good time was had by all.

We took off for the mountains the following morning, but first our stop at the airport for the left luggage. That took quite some time, but we finally headed south to Banff (we stayed in Canmore actually). After a good night's rest, we drove from Banff to Jasper, stopping at Lake Louise for pics and at Athabasca Falls for a hike and some pics. Our first stop was at Lake Louise, where we realized that Dad had left his glasses and jacket in Canmore, so we had to go back and retrieve those, but it was no big deal at all -- what better place to spend some extra time driving around???

So, then it was on to Athabasca -- just before we reached Athabasca Falls, I saw the mountain God used to call me. Somewhere around Wabosso (I think) or something like that.

Then we drove through Jasper and ended up at Pocahontas Cabins at about 8:30 p.m. Ate dinner and retired for a game of Scrabble about 10:00 p.m. It was a very, very restful night -- all that mountain air, you know! The next morning we got up, drove in to Jasper, had breakfast at a little cafe (it was a FABULOUS breakfast by the way) by the Shell station on the west side of town. Their cinnamon buns are out of this world for sure! Check them out.

So, we drove back to Edmonton and arrived about 3:00 or so. I went to Bible Study, my folks did some toodling about. We met up with some more people at the Oliver Square Tim Hortons -- met Wayne Graham, Rick and Laurie Harrison, Ron and Charlene Korzan, Rod and Brenda Peake, in addition to others they had already met on Sunday night. (By this time, little did they know, they met most of the Board of the church.)

Today, after catching breakfast at Sam's -- a restaurant highly recommended by Erica -- they went to Fort Edmonton for the day, then I cooked them a dinner of chicken, potatoes w/onion soup, brussell sprouts and cottage cheese.

Then, Patty Hertzog came over and played Scrabble and Golf with us. We had a fabulous evening of games, comparing weather notes, catching up, and just general fun.

So far, so good . . .

Thunderstorm

Oops -- can't update this now...

The Eagle Has Landed

I am sure they wish they were eagles! After finally getting out of rainy Detroit, after a delay of a plane that was due to "steering problems", after leaving a piece of luggage at Edmonton International, they arrived.

My bible study had a barbeque tonight and my folks loved every minute of it. I don't know what they thought a group of Christians would be like, but I imagine they were surprised.

They are all tucked into bed now and we head for the mountains tomorrow.

Sunday

Wow. It seems like a long time since I posted to this blog!

My folks just landed at Edmonton International Airport and called me from the rental car company. They are on their way to my house. They were supposed to come in yesterday, which I was really looking forward to, but with torrential, record-breaking rains in Detroit, the flight was not viable. So, they are here today.

I am praying that this week is a very good week for all of us; that they see the something special in my church family that I see. That they feel embraced and welcomed here. That they get some relaxation and feel the awesomeness of the mountains early in the week.

Pastor Bob gave an awesome sermon today -- he is on his game for sure. He spoke of Lori Lorence, who is just an awesome testimony of the the love of Jesus Christ. If you care to check it out, you may at:

http://www.centraltab.ab.ca/sermons/index.htm

Just choose whichever media you have available (WindowsMedia or RealPlayer) for the 07/17/2005 sermon. You won't regret it.

We are heading off for Banff tomorrow morning and won't be back until Wednesday evening sometime, after also visiting Jasper. It will be a great time for sure and I look forward to spending this time with my parents.

Madison

I met a young girl tonight -- her name is Madison. I would guess she is maybe 5 or 6 years old, and she is as cute as a button! Cuter, actually. . .

This meeting came about during a walk with my favorite golden retriever -- Silver -- and Joce (her owner). Joce hurt her back, so I am having fun walking Silver with Joce. We were walking along short cement winding path into a park, when a little girl came around the bend and walked toward us. We asked her if she would like to pet the dog. So, she did and we told her the dog was named Silver. She said "Silver" with a cute, slight, little lisp. I expected to see a parent come around the bend at any moment while she pet Silver, but none did. Madison walked off in the direction from which we had come, and we continued on. But I had a feeling we should get her and bring her back to the park up ahead of us, where other children were playing. Then a man called out a name -- I thought he said Jessica or something, but Joce heard it correctly. So, we turned around to retrieve Madison. She was nearly out of sight walking down a neighborhood street, but she stopped when we called.

Madison said her father was not at the park, but we managed to convince her to race Silver to the park and then convinced her to take us to her house. She really liked Silver and she was eager to show us where she lived. So we followed Madison through an alley between apartment buildings and as we emerged from the alley, two older women relaxing in the evening heat recognized Madison and told her that her dad had been looking for her. Her mom was walking down the street in the opposite direction, but came back when she was called out to.

As we met up with her mom, my heart sank in my chest. This young mom was sooooo skinny -- I would estimate she was 5'8" and maybe weighed 100 - 110 pounds. Maybe. Her legs were tiny and her skin appeared sunken around her shoulder blades. Her face was gaunt, but pretty nonetheless. Her hair was thin and wispy as hair of the undernourished often appears.

There are three types of people I have seen that resemble Madison's mom -- (1) the very, very ill, (2) the anorexic, and (3) the anorexic with drugs and/or alcohol issues. I wondered which of the three Madison't mom was coping with. We talked and she pet Silver. Everybody loves Silver. The neighborhood right there in this apartment complex appeared a little "rough around the edges" compared to the typical St. Albert streets. I wondered about Madison's everyday experiences there.

Our reading today was Psalms 1-3, and Acts 17

"I lay down and slept.
I woke up in safety,
for the Lord was watching over me."
Psalm 3:5

Tonight I pray for Madison and her mom. I pray that Madison is watched over and protected in all her everyday experiences, including her playing in the park. I pray that the Lord reaches out and grabs Madison's heart. I pray that if anyone remembers the day we brought Madison home, that is seen as the Lord watching over Madison. I pray that their family, if they don't currently attend a church, become aware of a new church going up just a tad south, and check it out! I pray that Madison's mom is okay and able to take care of Madison. Thank you Jesus.

Job, In the End

"I had heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I tkae back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance."
Job 42:5-6 (NLT)

The book of Job, in the end, has a message for me.

Maligne

Oh, my first taste of freedom was right here! How I long to recover that sense of freedom again. Today, I was reminded of the importance of pursuing that freedom. We all need it in our lives. There are so many things that just bind us up in a wad -- I ran down this path, and let me tell you, the dropoff is far steeper than it looks here. But I had a sense of freedom that has yet to be surpassed.

Tuesday

I was going to title this little entry "Terrible Tuesday", but I thought that was just too ridiculous, self-wallowing and pathetic. I seemed to manage to convey that sentiment anyway, though, right? :)

You know, I just don't get it sometimes. Why do I do the things I do?

I don't find Christianity complicated really, at all. It is really pretty simple. You make a decision to turn your problems, your troubles, your worries, your fears, your concerns, etc., right over to Jesus -- say "I'm tired of trying to handle this stuff all on my own -- I need your help." That's it.

From there, He starts working on your problems, troubles, worries, fears, concerns, etc. He sends help in all different ways and begins to transform your life. It is not scary or threatening at all -- check out Jesus in the gospels -- He would actually have been great to be with. The transformation simply brings you closer to Him. He gives you a heart for other people -- if you are like me, you might be seeing people with a somewhat jaded eye - He helps clear your vision and see people in a true light. He gives you a heart for whatever and wherever you are. And, he lets you know how much you are loved. In many different ways.

How does He do it? His Word -- just read a bit each day and refresh your mind and heart with the principles within the Bible. You don't have to have someone interpret it for you -- it is all pretty clear and I believe pretty simple, too. If it seems complex, you might just try asking God for a bit of clarity, and it all seems to become clear as you read - remarkable really. And even then, if it still seems a bit much to understand, start writing about what you read -- it really is amazing what comes through when you write.

Like this little entry. It started out with a slant towards "Terrible Tuesday" and ended up being a refreshing reminder to me of what I need to do when I don't understand why I do the things I do. Time to turn it all over to one who cares and who will help me figure it all out.

Maybe you are not much of a writer - well, let me tell you, the spoken word often works better anyway. He loves a good talk -- seriously, He does. I didn't believe it myself until I did it.

Back to the basics.

Sunday at Central

Well, we had a great sermon at Central today -- Pastor Bob kicked off his summer series called "Honouring God". All of his points were good, but one principle stuck with me -- "Give God the best of you or something or someone else will GET the best of you."

That really spoke to me today. I am sure I am not giving God the best of me -- if so, that is pathetic. It is so very easy to let difficult circumstances or negative people just suck the best right out of you, isn't it? Or at the very least take your focus away, however briefly or for however long! And there is difficulty in discerning when it is best to "not turn the other cheek", isn't it? I don't know -- sometimes, I wonder.

Today, though, I quit wondering for a bit, and just plain out prayed that God would help me give Him my best. That is all I want to do and frankly, I'm having trouble figuring out how to do it. He has to step in -- I KNOW he answers prayer, so I will be interested to see how he works with this one.

I feel very guilty right now for a number of things that I am trying to figure out how to deal with, including letting some situations and people suck the life out of me. It HAS to happen. I can't just keep existing and not progressing. Good grief!

I remember as a kid in Vermont, doing a little fishing for rainbow trout with my dad. And I remember for some reason being prone to catching mudsuckers -- the bane of my young fishing life. That's what we called them anyways -- you know, the fish that are just bottom dwellers. I remember feeling disgusted every time I caught one of them -- it felt more like they were catching me all the time! I had a plethora of mudsuckers in my life. Wastes of time, gotta throw them back since they were inedible anyways, good for nothing -- Mudsuckers.

But today, as well, I am grateful. As I sang and as I prayed to God today, I considered my salvation as provided by Jesus. I thought of the woman who through heavy crowds managed to touch Jesus's robe and was healed. And I thought of how lucky I am that Jesus allowed me to touch just a little piece of his robe as well. Surely that is more than enough for me to keep the mudsuckers at bay and give him beautiful, fresh rainbow trout instead.

Farmer's Market

Today was the first day of the St. Albert's Farmer's Market in downtown St. Albert. I got out of bed at 10:17 a.m. -- how ridiculous is that!? Not so ridiculous if you realize, I usually get to bed about 2 a.m. (got to work on that for sure, but I love quiet time for writing).

Anyway, I walked with Bob and Joce to the Farmer's Market around noon, and we spent a good couple of hours browsing among the vendor's wares and making some purchases, too. I was on a budget and did not make (in my view) too many purchases. But, my first extravagance was a Sun-dried Tomato Pesto to make for dinner for the three of us. Next, was half a bag of carrots (split with Joce). Then, a large jar of Honey Garlic Mustard (divine). I could not resist a container of olives (California style -- stuffed with an almond and some sun-dried tomatoe mixture) as an appetizer for dinner. And finally, a cucumber.

I was treated to lunch -- my first peameal bacon sandwich. I'd never heard of it before -- it was delicious. I dressed it with relish, hot peppers, and chili sauce, and quite enjoyed myself.

Then a hike (much longer) to get home, a long nap on Joce's couch, and then it was time to make the dinner. We had a great dinner, and then in honor of Canada Day, I was quizzed on Canadian facts -- I failed dismally, which is not all that surprising. We Americans know very little about our friends in the north, though they know alot about us. I certainly did not know we invaded Canada at one point in time.

Anyway, a little TV viewing of Live Aid, and it was time to call it a night. I still marvel that I walked home after 10:00 p.m. and it was daylight here. In fact, there was a beautiful sunset going on in the sky -- a sky full of purples, reds and blues and everything in between. Lovely.

A great Saturday for sure.

Job 22-24 and Acts 11 were the reading for the day. As we spent some time today watching Live Aid, watching stars, some of which have lead very "ungodly" lives in a public fashion, it is easy to understand Job's questions regarding punishment for the wicked. Job was righteous according to the bible. These are fair questions coming from Job. The danger, for me, is in thinking I can relate to Job in this way!

I thank God for his mercy and forgiveness and patience with me, because if he punished me for my wickedness, I'd have been long ago condemned and not able to write this out tonight. I am not Job.

Thank you, Lord.

Canada Day

Hmmmm.....this was my first Canada Day in Canada and I spent it in a most unremarkable way. I spent the day alone and was happy to do so, at least for most of the day.

I did my reading early on. Then I did quite a bit of research on the web in terms of how to protect a church website from spambots and robots. Tricky business. The pervasiveness of garbage all over the web and the insidious ways that these robots just keep slamming you with their garbage is disturbing.

Anyway, the rest of the day was spent communing with the Lord and napping -- some people would think I wasted a day. I would argue it was perhaps one of my most productive days.

Back to Job

I can't read Job's words without my own eyes welling up with tears. That sounds hokey, but it's true.

Job 12:5 --> "People who are at ease mock those in trouble. They give a push to people who are stumbling." (NLT)

I have felt on the receiving end of this bit of truth. But I am confident unfortunately that I have been on the pushing end as well. And if there is one thing I would have you pray for me today, it would be that that would not be the case again -- I cannot stand to see it happen to others, I don't like it myself, and behavior such as this is against the nature Christ would have me develop. It is so human and so typical to "join with a pack", just as animals do, and hang with those "who are at ease." But how much more there is to life when you inch out on the limb and comfort those who are in trouble and throw them a lifeline as well. Of course, you have to be willing to get rid of judgmentalism and fight your urge to judge another based on their circumstances. That is tough.

Job 17:6-7 --> "God has made a mockery of me among the people; they spit in my face. My eyes are dim with weeping, and I am but a shadow of my former self." (NLT)

I can totally relate to Job in this. How difficult it is for me to distinguish what is right in God's eyes vs. what is right in my own and everyone else's. I have no idea if I have got it right. (Frankly, most of the time, I suspect I don't have it right.) But there is a little war going on inside of me. Sometimes, I feel he has plopped me in the water right in the midst of a den of sharks who circle about me mercilessly. And I wonder why. To work on humility? To overcome the sharks? I like how Job cries out and explains his grief to God.

Now, I spent some time tonight considering Job's three "friends". Really, they were quite grieved when they saw what had transpired in Job's life -- so grieved that they sat in silence with him for 7 days as discussed before. So, I can only imagine that in their hearts, they were truly seeking to help Job. But if this wasn't such a serious bit of scripture, their responses to Job's impassioned and poetic pleas would be quite comical.

Job 11:3 --> (Zophar speaking) "Should I remain silent while you babble on? When you mock God shouldn't someone make you ashamed?" (NLT)

Job 15:2 --> (Eliphaz speaking) ".......You are nothing but a windbag." (NLT)

Job 18:2-3 --> (Bildad speaking) "How long before you stop talking? Speak sense if you want us to answer! Do you think we are cattle? Do you think we have no intelligence?" (NLT)

Oh my gosh! Can you imagine being Job? I can -- how many times my intentions are misunderstood. I never speak as clearly as my heart would speak. In fact, sometimes you would think I meant the exact opposite of my intentions. Communication is a tricky thing.

So, righteous Job has lost everything, all status, all money, all children, and then been told by his wife to "Curse God and die." His three friends mock him with words accusing him of "babbling" and of being a "windbag", and asking him to "stop talking" altogether. How much Job had to endure.

WOW (Word on Wednesday)

"I am not casual!"

The Lord spoke to me tonight. The study was on Revelation 1.

"I turned around to see the voice that was speaking to me. And when I turned I saw seven golden lampstands, and among the lampstands was someone "like a son of man, dressed in a robe reaching down to his feet and with a golden sash around his chest. His head and hair were white like wool, as white as snow, and his eyes were like blazing fire. His feet were like bronze glowing in a furnace, and his voice was like the sound of rushing waters. In his right hand he held seven stars, and out of his mouth came a sharp double-edged sword. His face was like the sun shining in all its brilliance. "
Revelation 1:12-16 (NIV)

As we were asked to close our eyes and think about Jesus in the context of Revelation 1, I felt Jesus sit beside me. Obviously, I had asked him to comfort me and sit beside me as my friend. I think that some of the imagery in Revelation is frightening -- and this description of Jesus is so far away from the descriptions of Jesus throughout the gospels.

I enjoy my image of Jesus as my "hippie, flower-child" friend -- and I believe He is that when it is appropriate. I probably seek that alot when my behavior leads to me beating myself up, or when I get the feeling of being out-ranked or under-dressed, etc. At those times, I need to remember that Jesus could look alot like me if I met Him on the street today and that I can feel comfortable talking to Him. I get complacent sometimes with this image.

But that does not define Him. "I am not casual." I was so intrigued by these words that were whispered in my year, that I looked up the word "casual" on dictionary.com. Check it out:
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=casual

After reading it, I am sure you will agree that Jesus is anything BUT casual. That word was very carefully chosen by Him tonight. Some of the words from the definitions there are: irregular, infrequent, occasional, offhand, superficial, nonchalant, lenient, permissive, not close, passing. There are some others that are more ambiguous. But these are the prevelant words, and Jesus is none of these. Indeed . . .

He is regular.
He is frequent.
He is constant.
He is planned.
He is in-depth.
He is attentive.
He is clear.
He is diligent.
He is close.
He is faithful.

He is NOT casual. Tonight I was reminded of Jesus as King of all Kings. And that I would like to be right with my boss while there is still time.

Job

"Yet your real motive -- I know this was your intent -- was to watch me, and if I sinned, you would not forgive my iniquity." Job 10:13-14 (New Living Translation)

I know Job made a false assumption here, but sometimes, I can totally relate. Things don't always make sense. I don't know who in the bible, other than Jesus, was tested like Job was tested. Honestly. I mean, Paul was definitely persecuted and tested, but he seemed to know why! Job had no reason to suspect why he was suffering so.

I hate that when that happens, don't you?

In perspective, though, I am amazed constantly at God's grace and mercy extended towards me on a daily basis (sometimes way more frequent than that). I can't imagine what he sees in me, but I am happy that he sees something.

I am still astounded while reading Job. He was so resilient through receiving all the bad news and his wife's quasi-condemnation. I can only imagine what it must be like to suffer all that, then have your health attacked. Then, to have your friends come in and press you for the sins they are sure you committed. It is amazing Job lived!

Saturday Night

I love Saturdays. No alarms are set, there's no need to rush through showering and getting ready for the day, no rush to things read before heading off to work, etc.

Today was another lazy Saturday. Poor Joce has hurt her back, and she was ordered not to sit today at all. So, we ran a couple of errands, then took a couple of walks. Silver, Bob and Joce's golden retriever, was in fine shape today -- very bright and alert and playful. We played in the yard, then played in the field. A nice nap, then out to the yard to brush Silver (she was like putty in my hands) as Bob & Joce made a fabulous dinner of steak, potatoes and a greek salad that was out of this world!

Then off to worship practice. Oh, I probably performed my personal worst at this practice...which bugs me because the band was again soooooo good. They all play by ear. They all had the same music I did, yet they were all able to do just excellent things with their instruments (mostly guitars). I felt completely blocked up. My experience over the past few times of playing with the worship team is that if the notes are not written down and practiced by me in advance, then I won't risk playing "ad lib" on Sunday. It is not completely that I am afraid of screwing up on Sunday -- I've played wrong notes on Sundays before and survived. It is just I am not sure of what notes I am supposed to play on the fly. It doesn't come naturally.

So, I don't like to end a day on that note, but there you have it -- tonight I will pray for quite a while about tomorrow's service.

Today's reading was from Job 3-4.

At this point, Job has suffered tremendous losses as outlined above. Though he has remained faithful to God, God allows Satan to test Job further. And while Job is scratching the boils that Satan uses to test him, his wife, the only thing he has left, tells him to curse God and die. Three of Job's friends arrive to comfort and console him. They were silent with Job for seven days, sitting on the ground with him and observing his suffering that was so much that he could not speak about it.

Actually, I will have to finish this tomorrow as I am literally falling asleep at this desk!

From Esther to Job

Tough transition. But today marks the beginning of another reading of Job -- we read Job:1-2. Please note that the following paragraphs represent how I imagine that things could have occurred but I make no pretense here -- I have not studied the times or context for any kind of historical accuracy or anything like that.

The first thing that struck me from our reading today was seeing that Job was an awesome father. He offered himself as interceder with God for his children. And I wonder if his children knew it at the time and fully appreciated that about him. I can only imagine that if they did know it, that they would have experienced overwhelming gratitude toward their father for his caring for them in this way. It seemed as if the children were not youngsters at the time, so Job must have continued caring for them as adult children.

Now, I imagine Job one fine day, in the evening, perhaps reading, perhaps praying, and everything is as it should be. A knock at the door. He (or his servant?) answers the door and a messenger stands before him, beaten, bruised, and frightened. Job thinks, "Hmmmm... wonder what this is all about?" The man's voice quivers as he gives Job the bad news that all his oxen and donkeys have been stolen and all the other farmhands were slain. The messenger's voice cracks and sobs overtake him as he remembers seeing his co-workers and probably family members, too, being ruthlessly killed.

Job seems to be to have been a great leader, so I imagine he hid well the shock that must have hit him upon hearing this news. I imagine that in his mind, he is saying, "What? What's up with this?" And before he even has time to react, in fact, before the messenger is done speaking, another knock is heard upon the door.

Another messenger comes in and stands before Job. This one is a shepherd and is gasping for breath because he had run all the way to Job's home from the fields. He begins to tell Job about how all of Job's sheep and all of the other shepherds were completely burned up by the fire of God from heaven. He also breaks down as he remembers seeing the charred remains of his friends and all the animals littering the fields where he worked. His adrenaline is still pumping and he is in shock as he still can't believe he was the only one to escape the massive destruction.

I imagine Job is simply stunned and looking at these men with a glazed look in his eyes, wondering if maybe he is having a nightmare. "This can't possibly be true," is what I imagine he would be thinking, because before the second messenger could finish delivering his terrible news, another knock on the door is heard. "No!" is what Job must have thought. "What now?"

Another messenger is brought before Job -- this one he recognized as a servant. In Job's head, a dialogue is going on: "Oh no, God, no, no more deaths, please! Let me wake up!" As this is running through his head over and over again, the messenger, badly shaken and barely able to speak tells Job that all of his camels are gone and all of his servants have died a violent death at the hands of Chaldean raiders. Tears run down the man's face as he remembers the shocked and frightened looks from his friends as their throats were slit.

Job starts shaking with shock. "WHAT IS GOING ON!? WHAT IS HAPPE....." Another knock. "Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. What else could possibly have happened?" A messenger is brought before him -- possibly a son-in-law or daughter-in-law -- their hair is tangled and wind-blown, their face, clothes and every part of their being is covered in dirt and dust. "Oh no, oh no, oh no, not my children. Lord, not my children, too!" Confusion surrounds him as he hears that all of his children are dead.

Maybe there was a moment or two of silence as Job absorbed all of this horrible news. And then, silently, tears begin rolling down his face. Despair overwhelms him as he remembers his children's faces, sees their warm smiles in his mind's eye, remembers their personalities, recalls the hugs they used to give him when they were little children. Loud sobs burst forth from his mouth -- they are rough and unrecognizable as human sounds. And then the wails start.

"I need to talk to you, God." He tears his robe in grief. "Oh Lord, please hear me now!" He shaves his head. "Hear my prayer, Lord!" He falls to the ground.

Sobs of grief rack Job's body as he lay on the ground before God. The messengers hear him speak, and a look of amazement comes across each of their faces, through their tears, as they hear Job pray ".......Praise the name of the Lord!"

Barb

On fire. Those are the only words I know to use to describe Barb. She comes from B.C., she recently married Jamie (great testimony there), and now they both live here in Edmonton. They started coming to Central late last year, and I believe they will be here quite a while.

What a breath of fresh air for sure. Confident, secure, in tune with God, a great future is in the making. Most of the time I know how fortunate I was in my childhood. But I think from now on, if I slip into thinking it was tough, I'll just think of Barb and pray for her. There is no comparison.

She overcame struggles and is now in hot pursuit of God's plan for her life -- went through Bible College, interned as a youth pastor in Kelowna, and now she is here with her husband.

Thank you, Lord.